My spirit was much lighter, probably as a result
of that. I've had too much stress, from being
sick, and anger at the whole human race this
week, probably because I'm sick, hormonal,
disgusted with everything, and probably
clinically depressed.
I don't have the luxury of Prozac or chemical
relief, not having medical insurance or access
to any medical care, but, I have great faith
in Jesus Christ, and that is the most important
thing in my life.
At this stage of my life, all I want is to become
a better person, to serve God without strife,
sickness, or bitterness. I can't believe how
nasty I have been, re-reading some of my
venom written this week. I feel like deleting
the entries, but, I won't. It's part of me,
and maybe seeing the ugliness of it will
help purge it from me.
Thanks to YHWH for sparing many lives
in the Mineapolis tragedy. My dear young
friend Marc is in Law School at U of M, and
he emailed all his buddies, to let us know he
was safe, but, was on the merging access
lanes crawling to get on I35 when the
bridge collapsed. He's a great communicator
and even though his description of it was
brief, I could sense how traumatic it was.
When I think of how God spared so many,
the children on buses, my friend, and how
phenomenal it was that hundreds aren't
dead, I rejoice in thanks.
Still, the lives lost shouldn't be minimized.
Even though the human cost could have been
worse, it is sobering to recognize how every day
is a gift.
That's another reason I'm glad that my bitter core
is dissolving, at last. I think my writer's block is
starting to collapse. Every time I sit down to write,
my brain is too full of layers of things to let the words
come out effortlessly.
I hope I can get it back, because it's frustrating not
being able to see any grace in my words..
even blogging.. ick. I hate myself. :(
Oh well. I still thank God for the progress
I'm making. It's like being high on heroin
when you've been suffering in pain, then
it goes away. Just feeling normal again feels
like being blissed out on a narcotic high.
What else... oh, I am so thankful that my
intercession for Lana Clarkson's frenemies
to be impeached was rewarded today!
(I'm sure I'm not alone in beseeching
the Lord about Lana Clarkson, and this
trial, but, I rejoiced today!) It was better
than I ever imagined it could be. How
rapidly the lying frenemies of Lana's
were made small and meaningless today
by the testimony of her agent, and best
friend, Nili.
Lana's REAL best friend, Nili Hanson stuck a stake
in the heart of the vampiric, hideous Punkin Pie.
Turns out that Lana was friendly with Pie, but, more
in an acquaintance way, more networking with
Pie's club dates and events. Her shows at the clubs
did attract industry folks and some rock and rollers.
Pie sent a mass-mailing at Christmas in 2003 to her
2000 bestest best friends, with her holiday greetings.
In it, loud and clear, she states Lana was murdered by
Phil Spector. HAHAH!!! I cheered!
When Allan Jackson specifically asked THIS LIAR
Pie if she ever stated to people Phil Spector should
fry for killing Lana, she vehemently denied it, "because,"
in her words, "I didn't believe he killed Lana."
She's imPEACHed Pie. On Monday, Michael Bey is
testifying. He's the producer who supposedly snubbed
Lana, according to Pie and her bright orange botoxed
friend Jennifer, and his slight sent her into a suicidal decline.
Bey wrote on his website that Pie was a pathetic liar, and
called her a piece of shit, which she really is.
Nili Hanson was gorgeous, and as bitter, trampy, played
out and haggish as the orange vampires were, Nili, who
was closer to Lana's age, was radiant and upbeat,
reflecting Lana's youthful beauty.
If that wasn't amazing by itself, as a magical moment
in the trial, by some twist of fate, the clueless defense
attorney, Roger Rosen, needing to stall for time, (
to keep Nili off the stand, I think) during his cross-exam
of Lana's manager, the witness before her, put Lana's
video into evidence. What was he thinking?
Nili only had today to testify, since she's going on
vacation. The defense tried hard to keep her away.
Rosen was trying to show Lana as a washed up bad
actress, but, she was GOOD! This video showed Lana
in life, bringing her to life, destroying the image of a
depressed has-been nobody, dime a dozen old ho'bag
like Pie and Jennifer portrayed in their own lives,
and demeanor on the stand. Lana looked bad just
for having these old trashy broads for friends,
but, Nili was more like it.
The video supported the similarity between Lana
and Nili, and put a wide abyss between Lana and the
trash-sisters. It made it what it is, some lying witches
grabbing some opportunities for themselves with
no heart to stomp on a murdered woman's memory.
Lana was even more beautiful and charismatic than I
imagined, or have seen in my dreams.
Nili Hanson had one of those infectiously cheerful,
but, engaging personalities. She was real. Spoke of
hard times with the balance of perservering through
adversity with hope for the future, and having a
work ethic, which described Lana. Through
her, and through the video, Lana was there today,
triumphantly speaking from the grave, smashing the
defense travesty, and with her light, showing the
evil in that remorseless rich man who took her life
away from her, and relished in destroying her
memory rather than taking a plea for manslaughter.
It was magic.
The killer even whined to the judge that one of his
army of lawyers was sick today and the trial should
be cancelled for at least until she got better. What
a joke. He said he was worried Linda had MS or MD.
The judge looked disgusted. He said no.
I pray this LA jury doesn't disgrace themselves
by hanging on the bank account of a juror.
Thank you so much Jesus, though, for no
matter what else is granted, today, Lana came
through, and even the blind could see the defense
team, the killer, and the lying paid off witnesses
for what they are.
OK, i'm repeating myself. I am
just so happy to feel better today
that I'm giddy about everything
and feel like God has heard my
prayers and granted my requests
and intercessions. That's the best
feeling and gift of all!
Check me out!
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