Sunday, October 26, 2008

Saturday night

Just to catch up on things... I've been working
on my jewelry line. It's gorgeous!!! As soon as
it's complete, I'll post it. In fact, I'm going to
do a jewelry design blog to accompany launching

I have been researching and getting my battle
plan for marketing, which I don't think will
be difficult. I live in such a glamorous city
where this kind of line will probably be
easy to sell, particularly since my line
is all under 100 bucks, even with some
high end gems. How does she do it, you
ask? I hate to admit that I get my stuff
from the Third World. What choice do
I have? I can't compete otherwise.

My Ft. Lauderdale line is a dream. It
consists of high end beach fantasy
pieces. I've also incorporated recycled
beach glass and other recycled charms
and beads. I have collected some
dreamy vintage beads and charms,
and scavenged countless discarded
and broken old necklaces and bracelets
for their parts.

It's been wonderful that John is back
in my life, even though it's frustrating,
at the same time because we're back
at the beginning, where he's 1000
miles away. I just pray for a way to
get back together, because I really
love him, and miss him more than
I can express. I realize that I'll never
meet anyone more perfect for me
and who I believe is my true soul

That point keeps being confirmed
and reconfirmed. I think about him
all the time, and vacillate between
joy at thinking of us having a life
together, at last, and fear of him
disappearing into the dusk, or
finding another girl to love, unable
to wait or fathom how we can
reunite for good.

He promises to come down to Ft.
Lauderdale in January, and at least
that's something to really look forward
to. I cannot wait! It's made me care
about my diet, my hair, my nails
and I even got my broken veneer
fixed. Before, I didn't care. I didn't
want to meet anyone, let alone have
anyone find me attractive. Why bother?
Jesus loves me just the way I am,

He's such a phenomenal person, and
so interesting. Most men are very
material, and few can engage in
conversations about film, poetry,
Jesus and God, Shakespeare, the Beatles,
Robert Plant and Allison Kraus....
You know, the things that really
matter. Most of all, he's got such
a tender heart. He has empathy
for people, and compassion. He's
known tremendous suffering, and
instead of becoming bitter from
it, he's emerged out on the other end,
as a pearl.

He's probably a much better person
than I am. He told me that I should
date and find someone to love.
But, he seemed happy when I said
I had no intention of doing that.
However, I do not want him to find
anyone else. I guess I don't think
about how lonely he is, and have
the grace to want his happiness
over my own selfish end.

I haven't been physically well, though.
I finally made that appointment with
the neurosurgery guy and we'll see
what needs to be done to alleviate
my problems. I've been so reluctant
to commit to surgery, but, I know that
I need to accept that, and schedule it
for next year, (after John comes down)
otherwise, I'll just get worse. I don't
want the surgery/surgeries before
January, in case I won't be up and
around when he is coming to visit.
That's more important. LOL.

I wanted to take him on a cruise to
the Bahamas, but, I forget that Ft.
Lauderdale and our beaches are just
as nice. When he lived here, he rented
a shabby flat on Ocean Avenue A1-A,
where we spent some of the happiest days
of our relationship.

We'd walk hand in hand along the beach,
and the surrounding neighborhood of
astounding mansions. There's
nothing more romantic in the world
than to be graced with the beauty
of the setting sun's colors and the
Caribbean ocean, and then the night
sky's reflection of lights on the black
ocean. The way the sea breeze feels...
the soft cool sand under our bare feet were
sensual and made me feel super

I don't even go to the beach anymore.
I live in a place with seven swimming
pools and spas. The beach seems too
far away with too many memories
to go there all alone. It would make
me so melancholy.

But, isn't it like that with most people
who live in tourist cities? We take
our natural resources for granted.
It takes guests to remind us of why
we live here.

The election is less than two weeks
away, and we're getting bombarded
with Barak volunteers. Dad and I
are always agreeable with them.
The truth is that McCain is pretty
uninspiring, anyway. When someone
comes to the door, or calls up and
asks if we're voting for Obama,
we say, "Who else?" It's worth it
to see their smile, and he'll probably

I pray for Obama, and pray for God to
lift him up. While my worst fears are
that he is part and parcel of the beast,
who am I to know? He could revitalize
the country's spirit, which is pretty low.
I do hate the bias of the media, though,
and the despicable voting scandals like
with ACORN, and the way they are
trying to secure the election with
bullying and dishonesty.

However, when I see and hear the
enthusiasm in his campaign volunteers,
I have to respect their dedication, and
their dream. In a way, it would be
tragic to burst so many people's hopes
and longing that would be validated
if Obama won. They would take it
as a token of their own worth, and
give young people hope in their future,
instead of the cynicism that has taken
away all national pride.

It's funny though, how our enemies in
the Taliban and Al Qaida actually would
prefer McCain winning, because he fits
in with their Jihad propaganda. If Obama
wins, he takes away their greatest thunder,
and they can continue to chip away with
their propaganda and lies against

Other than that, in the News, I was so
sad to hear about Jennifer Hudson's
mom and brother being murdered. She
is a sister in Christ, and I pray that God
lifts her, and comforts her. It's during
these kind of trials, when Christians
gain stability that eludes non-believers.
We are blessed in recognizing how
hope transcends this life. I pray that
Jennifer is able to grasp this as she
struggles with her loss.

Nothing great happening in the Casey
Anthony case. What really bothers me
is that the defense team has secured
Larry Kobilinsky, a criminologist who
I used to respect. He has turned 180
into an insufferable hypocrite, actually
striking down the science he was supposedly
dedicated to. It is always a huge disappointment
when people of character lose their way
due to money. He sucks.

Phil Spector is going on trial again. I
am committed to pray that this time
the little psychopath will be found guilty.
It's very depressing how LA juries are
star-struck, even though he can hardly
be called a star anymore. He's more
like a meteroite, burning out as he
falls to Earth.

Please Father God, in Jesus' Name, may
you bring Lana Clarkson's family justice.

Please Lord, provide justice for Caylee
Anthony. Give Tim Miller and Equasearch
the wisdom to look for her in the right
places, and even though Casey is downright
diabolical, leaving little remains of her
own flesh and blood, let their be some
proof of Caylee's flesh, and her little
life cut short by an evil fiendish mother.

I pray for God's Will to be ordained in
the selection and election of our President.
I ask that evil deeds will not go unnoticed,
and for election fraud, on either side, be
repudiated and prosecuted.

I thank the Lord for all the blessings in my
life, for John's affection and friendship, and
for the health and stability of my family (as
much as can be expected.) I thank God for
everything He has blessed me with, and
the joy in my life. Even when I'm depressed,
I have joy in knowing Jesus Christ.

Thank God for Jesus Christ, and the HOPE
and love, the friendship and comfort the
Beloved. May our bands be strong. May
Christ come soon! May He be worshipped
and praised forever, world without end.

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