Lovesick

I was swept up in personal affairs this past week,
so, I wasn't up to blog or continue my winter
study on SoS.

My brother and I sometimes fight like cats and
dogs, and have always been like that, but, I
really love him.. He's a genius, both
artistically and scholastically. He's got a mystical
edge, but, is very angry with Christ, mainly for giving
Judaism a second place status. While my brother
doesn't look Jewish, with his fair hair and
turquoise blue eyes, he's the type of Jew
people secretly hate, because he is patronizing
with many people who aren't Jewish, believing they
are often inferior. He is bitter that Jews
can't be the heavenly elite main race, the
"Chosenest of the Chosen", as if God only cared about
one small family of creatures above the rest,
and left the rest with no grace or place for
salvation.

Anyway, other than our screaming matches about
Christ, and Christianity, my brother and I
really do love eachother. He was stricken
with leukemia and God gave me the identical
genetic markers to be able to donate my bone
marrow, which saved his life and cured his leukemia.
It was a miracle. It even took place in the room
that his idol, Carl Sagan, had died in. My brother
adheres to his humanist creed, being a scientist
and that's what made the experience weirder because
immediately after Sagan died, my brother was put
in that room in Hutchinson's Cancer Hospital in Seattle.

It was ironic, because my brother adored Sagan,
who died, and for me, it showed that science and
human goodness cannot overcome death. The same
medical advances that saved my brother couldn't
save his hero, who also got a bone marrow transplant
from his sister.

That experience was profoundly mystical, all the way
around. We had some spiritual events....
Even today, I cannot speak of them.


He received my bone marrow, and as a joke he
got a Led Zeppelin tape and Bible from those
who knew how he and I were night and day.
You'd think at least some of what made me me
would take root in him!

The bone marrow took, but, he rejected both my
heroes in the Bible and pop culture.

Meanwhile, we both survived, and in my case, I was
richer with many deep spiritual blessings
that supported my faith for the years to come.

I see God everywhere and in everything, because
God is a Spirit, and He is LIFE. Jesus is incarnate
God, the manifestation of the Holy Spirit, the
invisible God. No one comes to the Father other than
through His Holy Son, whose blood is the atonement
for our sins. I am awed and grateful for the faith
to see Him, with grace to believe with all my heart
and soul.

He has proven to me time and time again that Christ
is my personal Savior. What's even more endearing
is that Christ has the same unconditional love for
everyone, every sinner, every hungry soul, yearning
for the sustenance that nothing in this world
can fill or satisfy. That's why humans are so easily
diverted into drugs, amoral sexual behavior, gambling,
and other destructive behaviors. The only way to
peace is to make peace with God Almighty through
Jesus Christ.

He is at the doorway of our souls, beckoning
anyone seeking comfort and peace. He adjures
us to come out of the scary empty world. He has given
us the blueprint of hope for the future, and in this
I constantly rejoice. As I get older, I get more
confident and feel younger. It's the opposite of
the world. Every year I age, I feel like I'm closer
to regeneration and transformation. For me, it's the
opposite of the world's portion for women, whose lives
are diminished with every passing year.

It's blatantly clear that this is the case in the way
the media indoctrinates people. I see Paris Hilton replacing
last decade's "It" girl, and watch how cruelly former
Its are treated. Pamela Anderson is reviled as a joke
and washout piece of trash, not because she's any
more trashy now than 15 years ago, but, because she's
40, the unpardonable sin of this world.

Jesus puts more value on women as they age, not the
way the world devalues us. This comforts me every
year I accumulate past age 40.

But, back to my story....

12 years after my brother survived leukemia,
and I survived nearly bleeding to death, another
crisis emerged. My brother went into liver failure
and was in a coma. I was preparing to give him
half my liver, and let me confess, I was scared
to death. It put my faith to the test because if
I bled out with just drilling holes into my pelvis
to harvest bone marrow, will I survive donating
the right lobe of my liver?

I didn't need to because inexplicably, my brother
revived on his own. Within 24 hours, his liver
function was normal, he was out of the coma,
and I was not faced with the choice with my
brother's death, or my own.

I love being tested, after the fact, because that
gives me confidence that I can face death in
faith that my life belongs to God and Jesus
Christ. Even though I was a wreck this past
week, I have been so humbly repentant of
all my many sins. No matter how I try to
be good, when faced with God, face to face,
I feel so small, dirty, sinful and unworthy.
The light is too bright not to blind me.

After surviving many trials, and ordeals,
I feel blessed by God to be counted worthy
of suffering for this goal of achieving
my heart's desire in Christ. God doesn't love me
any more than any other sinner. He is love,
but, he will also judge the world for usurping
the true faith, and persecuting the children
of God in Christ's Name.

I am not alone in believing these are the
end of days, when we are told to come out of the
whore, the unfaithful and corrupt church. The
majority of churches have embraced another lover,
and incorporated the mystery religion of Mesopotamia...

The totality of the institutional world church,
forms a treacherous scarlet woman, whose breach is
fornicating with world cultures, polluting the
way and holy sanctuary. They have corrupted
truth and obfuscated the way of holiness by
bringing pagan rites into the realm of Christianity,
combining the traditions and carnal desires of
man which are contrary to the laws of God.

This is why the world church appears as the
symbolic scarlet woman, but, the bride is
the believer who eschews the world and its' ways.
Friendship with the world is enmity with God.

Solomon was an example of a world leader who
made peace with other cultures and lost his
soul, his kingdom, and paved the way for the
final battle. Ironically, since he was still
a prophet, he also penned this magnificent
opus, along with many other sacred texts which
feed believers today. He learned late in life
that what he did was wrong, but, it was too
late for him to correct it. He knew his
descendants would forever pay the price
for his folly.

The Antichrist appears from out of nowhere,
issuing word words of greatness, and even peace,
making him seem like a lamb, but, inside is the
demonic dragon because there can be no peace
without making peace with God's Son, Jesus Christ
of Nazareth. The world leader appears righteously
cloaked in Christianity, yet his true nature is hidden.

When I see the signs of the end coming,
I feel myself leaping for joy, like that bride
anticipating her groom coming back for her. When
Christ discussed his crucifixion at the Last
Supper, the Apostles rebuked him, not understanding.
They only knew the carnal hopes of life that mortals
cling to, not grasping the immortal mystical promises
of God. They struggled to learn about His signs in
Christ fulfilling the Law, the rites of Judaism
and providing the hope for each generation until
he returns. They scolded him for speaking of
defeat, secretly hoping that Christ would be
crowned king in their view, and he would
rule a peaceful world then. They couldn't
grasp what he was saying.

We're the same way. As much as we want Christ
to come, we don't want the end to come. This
is because even though we're given a prophetic
window into the end, it is still frightening
and it is still the unknown. I realized this
last week, when faced with donating half my
liver, fearful of bleeding to death, that
I still don't want to die and pray for life.
It's an enigma, but, it's our nature to cling
to this life. Our life is still sacred, coming
from God.

However, making peace with the world, at the
cost of diluting our beliefs is a great
temptation. We have to be ready to accept
not only death, but, to stand up against the
world leader, whoever he may be.

If the world leader initiates a chip implantation
requirement, for "security" purposes, people
will definitely comply, because they trust
authority, even at the expense of their own
eternal souls and warnings about damnation.
All we know is the here and now, and we
are trained to obey in this way. It is at our
threshhold to be required to registered and
accept the number of the beast, yet, even
churches will recommend their flocks comply.
Surely God won't hold that against people
who want to protect their children from
predators, and protect our country from
hostile terrorists!

How blind we are, even when faced with
the text of these things in the Bible.

In the ancient Hebrew culture, the betrothed groom
would go off to build them a home, establishing
his own turf, and return for the bride when
that was completed. They would then make
a great wedding feast. So when Jesus told us he
goes to prepare a place for us, it is in line with
this culture. He said no man knew the hour
or day of his return, but, he did encourage us
in that we would be able to see the signs
because of prophecy. If we couldn't, then
what good is prophecy? Yet, many rebuke
Christians who proclaim these things are
coming true, using the logic that no man
can understand the time of Christ's return.

In Song of Solomon, the bride is an outcast amongst
the daughters of Jerusalem, the allegory for the
many denominations of Christ. They are angry with
her for not being the ideal Jewish princess. In
fact, she is black-skinned and descendant of
Ishmael, yet, in every way, a true princess
and daughter of David's sons, same as Solomon.
"Daughters of Jerusalem" is a term used
to describe David's literal tribe, since Jerusalem
was a city of David, a city of his tribe, Judah.
The bride is dark-skinned and from Ishmael
which is prophetic towards the believers
being both David's royal seed, and by grace,
the seed of Ishmaelites, the world, or gentiles,
who were outcasts in Jerusalem. This is
deeply prophetic and sings God's graces.

Solomon took it way too carnally, let's be
honest. He thought by his own wisdom
he could forge this peaceful eternal
kingdom by holding hands with his enemies,
and loving them, yet, they brought him down,
not by arrows and physical warfare, but, by
polluting the sanctuary, watering down the
laws of God and the kingdom of his
inheritance. These are not easy things to
understand on the surface, because we
are taught to try to embrace peace, at any
cost. Yet there is a time to die for our
beliefs because Christ told us to fear only
God, not man who is not able to throw
us in Hell. What good is gaining a few
decades on this planet, if we go to Hell
and are damned forever?

When Christ is ready to return, he promises us
a wedding feast. He told us about the ten
wise virgins, prepared for the end. He told
us about the wise followers, already prepared
for flight by waiting on the roofs for his
return. He told us about our flight. He
implored us to always be vigilant.

He compares us to his bride, and also Jerusalem
is identified with a living believer, much as Jacob
was originally named "Israel" for the entire nation
that Christ will inherit.

Because of this promise of Christ's return, I tend
to get animated about seeing signs of the end
of our age. These are not subtle things. Abortion
and mankind's belief that they can kill, even
their own flesh and blood fetuses, with bloody
abandon, is a big sign. I get chills when I read
about scientists manipulating DNA to forge the
way to creating new life. I see nothing but
wickedness in the media today.

I have watched incredulously as the corrupt
SAG media writers, who in my opinion are
major harbingers of evil propaganda, are striking
their share of the big wealth. I laugh because I
think the best thing that could happen is if they would
be banned from writing forever. This is because
these individuals are partly to blame for
corrupting billions of souls and God help them.
The type of material filtering into children's
souls is appalling and depressing. They are
conditioning people to accept damnation.
We're living in a culture where people are
tatooing 666 and demons on their very
flesh!

I behold the signs and the tools of the devil,
like the media, how he has control of the world's
governments, now unifying into a central one-world
order. I see what's happened to Europe and the EU. The
Mark of the Beast is a reality that's here. In the next
decade they will absolutely be requiring first ID
cards and then the chip implantation. They
are already implanting chips in people, pets and
trying to convince dimwitted spiritually retarded
parents that this will make their children
safer.

I behold how this Muslim shill Obama Hussein
is rapidly gaining ground in this election came
outta freaking nowhere, from out of virtual thin
air into the national scene, with no viable
credentials to lead the world today. JUST
like we're told the Antichrist will happen on
the scene, this guy is the sweetheart of literally
ALL the media, and movie stars..

I behold how the most wicked world families of
corruption in this world today, like the
Kennedys, are supporting him, like it's
"Rosemary's Baby" and they're coming
out of the woodwork, for real.

Many Christians cling to this notion he will
be a secular or genetic Jew, because of the
verse in Daniel about how he will not follow
the religion of his fathers, but, that fits
Osama Hussein to a tee, too!

I am left with a curious dilemma, whether
to dread his possible nomination and
election, succumbing to my gut's dread,
or embrace with wonder how he could be it.
I do literally mean it, the 666 one, OG, the real
one, not Al Crowley.

Dude is handsome, young, charismatic, and
came out of nowhere. Because he is black,
it is politically incorrect to use race against
him, or even criticize him, because the
media has people trained in not being able
to speak openly any more. It's amazing how
conditioned the public is. Baaaah-baaaaaaah
sheep, but, unlike Christ's flock, following
him, they will not hear Christ's voice and
will follow this handsome shill...

There is very little free thought or analytical
thinking processes left in people. Education
drills it out of them. The media has utterly
corrupted free thought, despite its' ostensible
range of topics. We're being programmed like
the sheep the immortals see in us.

We are helpless to defend ourselves from
these forces without the help of Christ's angels,
and His divine protection. At least, that's my
belief.

If the pop star, Bono tells people to stop
driving cars, because they aint green,
they do it, even if that Bozo flies using
up millions of their puny carbon footprints.
H Y P O C R I T E S and conspirators.
They are puppets and false prophets of the
beast.

It's all conspiracy, and Obama Hussein fits
right in, in my opinion. I almost feel glee
thinking of how if he's elected, we can look
forward to the Cube coming soon!

He does not follow the strict religion of his fathers,
which is Muslim, but, instead is affiliated
with a dreadful world church, the UCC, one of
the very deadest and worst of the whorish worst.

All of these world, or "United" churches, whether
they are United Lutheran, or Presby, or Baptist
or CoC are D E A D and functional as political
socioeconomic pulpits, the antithesis of what
a church should be. One needs to only ascertain the
spiritual climate through Osama's dubious and
controversial, racist pastor to see the writing
on the wall with these things staring us in the
face...


I think that if Osama is elected, beginning his
reign in the winter of 2009, that puts the 3.5 mark in
2012! It's really too perfect to resist not seeing
how it fits .

It is also ironically analogous to the real
King Solomon, who made peace with the warring
and hostile nations around, but, at a great cost.
He married foreign princesses, a thousand of them.
He built up their religions, next to the Holy
Sanctuary he was ordained to build in Jerusalem
for YHWH.

He is the epitome of adultery and betrayal, and
a microcosm of that which is to come. Friendship
with the world at a cost by sacrificing your
beliefs isn't the way to get past the pearly
gates. This is why it's an enigma that is
a common theme in the Old and New Testament,
from the time of Solomon's apostasy and rebellion,
to the time of the end, when a false man of
peace comes with the sheep's wool of Christ's
flock, while hidden underneath is betrayal
and plans for the beheading of every last
jew and Christian, the way the Islamic world
is functioning today.

As a kid, I wondered how the world allowed
the Holocaust, but, here we are 60 years
later, watching Christian children being
beheaded in places like Indonesia, Ethiopia
and all over Africa. Yet we send them aid.

Again, what seems good to the world's cause
is not compatible with God's plan. We should
always extend compassion to others, but,
Christ forewarned us not to throw pearls
before swine because they will come and
rend us. It's not that pearls are wasted,
but, the truth of God infuriates them. We
see this in the attacks church workers
face in these regions which forbid
Christianity.

There is a holocaust happening today, with
celebrities collecting money to give to
their leaders, planning world domination
and our demise. It's as poorly thought out
as Solomon's peaceful kingdom. His wisdom
failed him. The kingdom was destroyed
because he relied on his human beliefs
and rejected what his father David had
taught him.

The Antichrist will act like a man of peace,
and is compared to a lamb for the first
3 years, restoring a peaceful unity in the
world governments with the ostensible
trappings of peace. But, after 3.5 years,
when the Sacred Cube returns and we
are taken up, all hell will break loose
down below: Civil disobedience; Terror;
Infrastructure collapse and chaos. This
will substantiate the mark of the beast,
the chip in the hand....

It is all there. It is ready and in place.

So, I'm not unhappy if Osama Hussein
wins, because it means Christ is that
much closer. The bridegroom is coming
and the hope is glorious. Nothing can
describe my happiness when I see it in
my mind's eye. I see it coming, like being
able to read the next page through the print
of the page in front of it. I see Him and I
hear the saints marching in!

This is what the Song of Solomon does to
me. Each time, I get deeper, it cuts deeper
into me, and sometimes, it feels like the
world is synchronized to accompany these
events. That's what's great about having
a relationship with Christ. Everything feels
personal. He has infinite love. He is so
glorious and awesome that my words
are pitifully inadequate. If I could describe
him, I'd use the language of Shulamite,
Solomon's bride, and exalt his physical
beauty, and the exhilaration of being
in his proximity. I definitely identify with
the hard longing of wanting to be with
him, every second of every day. I am
so in love with him, my head swims.
I am love sick, but not sick of his love.