Saturday, August 2, 2008

Open eyes

My brother and nephew were in Ft. Lauderdale,
and had dinner with us last night. He brought
up the night we saw the star and UFOs.

He was only 13 when we saw the impossibly
radiant star, whose spires reached to the ground
and then seemed to burst, followed by the
zig-zagging and swirling UFOs, as I described
last week.

Out of the blue, he brought it up. He remembered
every detail, which surprised me because
he was so young. Then again, I remember
every detail of my first UFO experience and
I was only 11. We both said the same thing
at the same time, referring to the couple
who was jogging with their dogs and looked
up but didn't seem to care! In front of their
eyes, a miracle was occurring, but, their
concern was keeping their heartrates in
the aerobic zone.

He's a psychologist-in-training now, and
it was wonderful to see how open-minded
he is, and he acknowledged the synchronicity
in all it's aspects. He said, "look at the way
we both mentioned the joggers at the same
time."

My brother sat there scowling. I could
hear his thoughts, thinking that the three
of us, dad, Drew and i, were mistaken,
and if he didn't see it with his own eyes
then it didn't happen. I honestly think that
even if he did see it with his own eyes,
he would refuse to see it, just like the
joggers who looked up and then were
more concerned about their darn
workout than the miracle happening
in the heavens.

My brother didn't see it because he was
in Seattle at the time, dying of Acute
Myologenous Leukemia. He was in
the ICU room that Carl Sagan had
just passed away in which was very
eerie. It was a very strange period in
our lives. My dad and I were staying
with my nephew in Austin at the time,
and it seemed like our lives were out
of control, in the hands of God, and
we prayed for mercy.

My brother received that mercy, and
against all odds (he was a 5 percent
chance of living five years...) and still
he won't acknowledge God.

It goes to show how many are born with
eyes, and a spiritual essence, but, live to
please the flesh alone, not caring about
anything beyond their own pulse.

My dad's UFO experience with what I call the
"Cherubims in formation" was similar.

He watched a miraculous formation
of celestial lights perform by going in a four
way spiral and then back together again
to form one huge radiant light. He knocked on
his neighbor's door to witness it. The man was
a mathmetician, a real scientist,but, just dismissed
it without much concern. He was hosting a card
party, and had other things to do.
He observed it, then dismissed it saying,
"Maybe they're opening up a supermarket!"

It infuriated dad, and infuriates him to this
day, because he was in the military and knew
that searchlights come from a source on the
ground. The orbs he saw were intrinsically
illuminated.

It is almost like many are born with a second
sight, as well as so many who are
spiritually blind to anything beyond pleasing
and possessing their own withering flesh.

None of us knows for a certainty what happens
after we die. Yet, what creates seekers and
distinguishes them from those who simply
don't care, don't believe in God, and are
content to be like the flower in the field,
to blossom for a minute and then be absorbed
back into the protoplasm of existence?

I'm not putting people like this down, because,
I have no way of knowing why my life is
defined by my passion to know God in Jesus
Christ. There is barely anything that matters
more than my love of Jesus Christ. I adore
my jewelry and spend 10 hours a day or
more doing my craft. It seems incongruous
with such a non-material obsession as
seeking God. Even in my gems, I see
God. I think of the Seventh Heaven which
is cryptically defined in Ezekiel as a place
which is decorated with precious gems
that are self-illuminated with indwelling
firey light. "Stones of fire." I think of the
gates of the Kingdom, each made of
pearls and adorned with every precious
stone. I think of the streets paved with
gold that is so pure that it is clear like
diamonds. I reflect on God who created
these treasures, and their beauty. In
EVERYTHING there is a witness of
God the Creator.

Last night, my nephew, dad and I were
discussing the crop circles and fractals.
I consider fractals as the "Fingerprint
of God" since they possess the esoteric
DNA to creation, expressed in mathmatical
rhythms repeated from the tiniest cell
to throughout the galaxies of heaven in
the macrocosmic sea. The limitless
wonder and beauty is a witness to
God, himself. Of course my brother
said that most are hoaxes and man-made,
and sure we know that! But, there
are too many that are miraculous.
They cannot be defined as man-made
because they possess electo-magnetic
energy, and are too complicated for
any known technology, as well as
the time-constraints needed to
produce them. They exist in
a paradox, with messages that
are clear. There is something going
on... We don't know if they're
purely extraterrestrial, angelic,
or demonic, but, it still has a
big question mark that demands
our attention. We don't know a
thing when considering the mysteries
of God.

How can anyone not praise God?
How can anyone be less than passionate
when observing the oceans and skies,
the flowers and birds, the stripes on
a tiger, the neck of a giraffe, the
neon colors of a fish, and the species
of each part of creation?

Yet, there are many who are afraid to
let go of themselves to engage in a
free-fall of personal will, and allow
themselves to fall into the hand of God.
It must be dreadful to have no vision,
no eyes to see Him. It must be terrifying
when they are sick, or falling asleep,
not to have the knowledge of His grace.
What is more, what makes any blaspheme
His name, and live disreputable lives,
without ever caring about anything more
than pleasing the flesh? What makes some
treat other creatures with cruelty,
even killing, or hurting with deliberation?

I almost feel like I am not a part of the
race of people around me any more.
I don't understand it. I really don't.
Pornography is evil, yet, a huge culture
exists to distract humans into falling into
this net. I guess when you've become
ensnared in filth and are drowning in
dirt, your eyes cannot be lifted. Maybe
that's what makes them blind?

I know I'm not better, just different.
I know that just as God gave some blue
eyes, that He gives some this second sight,
and insight into eternal life through Him.

It is His gift alone, and I treasure this more
than all the treasure, even all the gems
and love of gold and silver that I am
helpless to admire and collect. We all
have some idolatry, and love of our
flesh, so, I'm no better. I was plagued
by lust throughout my young hottie
days, too, and I am not judging people
for their sexual addictions. I know that
while I was lost in that lifestyle, that
God was not in my thoughts or sights,
and I was essentially empty, miserable,
and sometimes despaired of exiting.
If I had remained blind, I would have
committed suicide, or become a drug
addict.

I was thrilled that my nephew had that
spiritual side as well. My niece doesn't even
believe in the soul. She is tormented. I wish
and pray that she could have this sight given
to her by God.

My brother considers himself a scientist. His
eyes are darkened. His idol was Carl Sagan.
He believes in science, without the acknowledgment
of the Creator in a defined way. He's content
to be agnostic and define God in a general
way, like the life energy, that kind of
insulting generalization that those who
spurn religion find convenient to express,
which makes them feel smarter than all the
fools for Christ like myself who are the scum
of the world and are considered backwards.

When my brother got leukemia, he went
to Seattle for a bone-marrow transplant,
right after his childhood inspiration, Carl Sagan.
Sagan was being treated there for a rare
bone-marrow disease, and he got a BMT
from his sister, the same as my brother
got his bone marrow from me. Sagan died.
My brother got cured.

My brother who idolized Sagan all his life
saw his life fading away in the same room
where he had just died. What did Sagan
see in the moments when he died? Did
he simply vanish, cease to exist, or did
the knowledge of the billions and billions
of stars, each one a miracle, open his
eyes at last?

It was certainly spiritual, in a bizarre way,
and totally synchronistic in a real show
of God's uncanny system. It spoke loudly
to me, at the time. This was why seeing
that event in the sky, with my nephew
and dad, was even more inspiring.
We felt like something powerful was
occurring all around us.

My brother lived and Sagan died. Instead of
embracing the miracle, my brother refuses
to understand the power of prayer, of God
and the LORD's ironic way of getting our attention.

Sorry for the repetitions, but, it is for
emphasis on something that words alone
fail to portray.

Anyway, while my dad, nephew and I waxed
messianically ecstastic over the miracle of the
Star of Bethlehem-AustinTexas, and the UFOs,
my brother had a disgusted smirk on his face.
I wanted to smack him! My dad, Drew and I
all saw this, yet, he doesn't believe we
witnessed a miracle.

My brother and I saw the UFOs in our
childhood, and he can accept that as a
machination of science, either terrestrial
and government top-secret, or
from another species. Yet, the subsequent
UFO experiences dad, Drew and I had
confirm that there's a supernatural
component to the sight of these
celestial things or beings. He will not
consider this as being the case. He thinks
we're hysterical and far-reaching, even
hallucinating in a group.

It makes me so sad that someone with
as many graduate degrees as my brother
and an IQ much nearer to 200 than mine,
can be so one-dimensional, without the
freedom of thought to let himself go,
and let God grab hold of his intelligence,
and fill his soul with the peace of His
light. He is a tortured soul, too.

It may be that UFOs as we've experienced
them have nothing to do with God. We
may be witnessing something that we
cannot understand, or that is part of
a technology that seems to be coincidentally
linked to us. The point is that to be
intellectually free is to be liberated to
accept all theories, even Creation.

All I can express is my belief in miracles
and in personal knowledge that even though
each one of us are small in the universe, that
we matter enough to receieve personal miracles
every day... if only we open our eyes
to witness them.


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